While in Boston with the Bennion clan, Missy showed me her first Family Blog Book. It is a masterpiece that will certainly become a family treasure. As I was looking through the book, I came upon a post she did years ago after Sam was born where I gave her three pieces of advice. Missy could remember two of the three for the post. I believe I now remember the third item.
1. The first was, not to be heroic or wonder woman when you come home from the hospital. Get all the rest you can especially during the first several months after bringing a little one home. One can endure and survive almost anything, if they have some rest so my advice to her was to allow Brad to help even during the night. I realize this is hard when mom is nursing the baby and there seems little a husband can to do help out. We have been blessed with wonderful sons and son-in-laws that jump in and fully co-parent with their wives and are rearing fabulous families.
2. When we moved from our little home on 2700 South and lived Aunt Jeannie's while Dad and Brother Joe where remodeling our new home on 300 East to make livable for our family, I learned a real lesson in humility and giving. This was a very hard time in our lives. Family finances was pushed to the limit in the remodeling so there was not extra cash to hire labor. Dad worked hard and tirelessly on the home before and after work. I remember standing on the second floor of the home looking down through a large hole to another hole on the first floor into the basement wondering how we were ever going to put the house back together again. As I was crying, I said to your Dad, "We didn't put that much money down on the home, maybe we can just walk away." The project was mammoth in scope. Brother Joe famously would say..."We just need to put a "little" hole right here....." The words always conjured up great fear in my soul, for there never was such a thing as "just a little hole" or he would say "there are two ways to fix this problem, the easy way or the right way, what will it be?"
It was during this time, I learned the second great lesson. We had so many wonderful friends stop by and volunteer to help out on the home in so many ways such as demolition, sheet rocking, painting, hanging cabinets, helping with the counter tops etc. I learned although it was hard to be in the place of accepting help, it was a blessing in our lives to have the help. I believe it is harder to be on the receiving side of other's kindness, but it is important to learn accept the help graciously. Although you may never be able to repay the kindness to a certain person, your responsibility is to pay the kindness forward and help someone else in need. Teach your families the importance of kindness.
3. The third piece of advise I gave Missy came from my mother. I remember calling her one day when Mindy, Cindy and Steve had just made one of their super messes in our little home on 2700. Now if you remember, this was not a very big little home for 5 children, 2 parents and 2 dogs and a Grandma. I could have not ever been too far away, I would turn my back for just an instant and these three little minds worked fast and furiously in creating destruction. One of their favorite tricks was to take all of the eggs out of the refrigerator and crack them and smear them all over the coffee table in the living room. Some times they would add Tang to the mixture for good measure. Another favorite trick was to crawl up in the hall closet and get the cleanser and shake it all over the kitchen and living room. It was like one brain moved three little bodies, hands and feet to mischief. I called mom totally distraught at whatever destruction they had just performed. Her advise to me was...."when you think about it, it is really kind of funny. You have two choices, you can break down, sit in the middle of the room and have a good cry and that would be okay, or you can try to look for the funny side and have a good laugh. Most things have the funny side; so laugh, life will be easier. If you can laugh at it, you can live through it."
On this Mother's Day, I feel so very blessed to have such wonderful children that have added greatly to my life. You have all given purpose to my life. I love you all and are so grateful for each and every one of you. I am glad you came into our home and I did not miss out on any one of you.
While my out of state siblings might be able to boast about the unique and interesting things that could attract Glama and Bampa for a visit besides their darling children I am afraid that we here in San Anton may have your Freedom Trails, Quakers and Space Needles beat. We have a living national treasure here in our town. Jazz great Jim Cullum from NPR's River Side Jazz. As if being the front man to NPR show was not enough the talented Mr. Cullum is a trumpet player! It was fun to see Bampa sneak up on him and talk shop about their trumpets. I also heard Bampa REPEATEDLY tell him that he needed to come to SLC and that he listens to River Side Jazz every Saturday from KUER. Seriously a fabulous night, come again soon!
Onlu Mom had enough wisdom to hide behind the menu.
